Mental Health

A Vendetta.. The listlessness of a sombre evening… | by Debarati Sen | Sep, 2021

A Vendetta.

The listlessness of a sombre evening draws me into its vortex of indolence.
My thoughts wage a war in my cerebrum.
They are always in a fury.
Waging destruction like the Titanomachy.
This ennui is gradually scavenging on to my aplomb
Deriding at my paranoia.
My heart thumps heavily
My body trundles under the weight of colossal anxiety.
I close my eyes and try for a quick nap
There is a stampede in my chest .
Like the fear of being alone in an unknown city,
Like a nomad in perpetual search of a home.
The fear spreads like a penumbra
Gripping me with its tremulous claws.
I wake up disheveled.
Try to put together myself with a Herculean travail.
My eyes are puffed from insomnia
My fingers tremble.
It has been a decade now.
Surviving with bipolar is nothing less than a vendetta against myself.
My inner David fights this combat every day
Trying to win over this Goliath named anxiety.

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