Cancer

Living a life of happiness and fulfilment : Dr Purnima, my mom | by DrEmbryo | Nov, 2021

( 25th November 19555 -22nd October 2021)

As part of prayer meeting held on 27th October 2021, in Surat

Dear friends and family first of all , thank you for making time to be here in memory of Mummy. Yes I have always called her mummy and I feel truly blessed to have known her and called her my mom since the last 21years. What mom did in the last 35 years in the sleepy small village of Killa Pardi is unimaginable and was very very hard, imagine starting a Space programme in Surat after getting inspired from Elon Musk today, well setting up an IVF lab in 1995 was harder than that, but she persisted, her stubborn ness to get things done was one of her biggest strengths. Not only stubborn she was one of the most fearless persons I have known. She was never scared of people, circumstances or situations. She was always finding ways to fight rather than be intimidated by them. My first memory of mom was her when she and dad were against Pooja and I getting married, even though a modern Indian woman she had these old apprehensions about inter caste marriages, strange but true. She resisted but Pooja was her mom’s daughter, even more stubborn and resilient than them. After 3 years of patience and trying to get her married to someone else, they gave up and relented.

In those early years During a heavy monsoon deluge, her flight from Delhi got diverted to Ahmedabad from Mumbai, We picked them up from airport and the plan was for them to catch the train . I was worried , even dad was worried ki train ticket kaise milegi , but mom as always confident . In those days, 95% of people travelled by train and train bookings on overnight training was almost impossible Here she was, mom lifted her saree with one hand, purse in another and barged into the station master’s room pulled out her visiting card like James Bond pulls out his gun and asked for a ticket, obviously the station master refused so she calmly sat down and told the station master, tu ticket bhi dega aur chai bhi pilaaega , bol pehle kya dega ? And in 15 minutes, wahi station master came to the coach to drop them off She had this immense power over people of getting them to do things , she had this positive aura and grace which was unmatched. I can’t visualise her without her kanjivaram saree, her mangalsutra and smile on the face reaching the eyes. Mom was never over powering or intrusive in our relationship .

After marriage we settled in Surat and Samvit was born along with the birth of our first hospital, She could not get a better excuse to come and see us. Every Wednesday and Saturday she would catch the morning Valsad intercity at 7 15 am to reach home for breakfast

This was her routine for every Wednesday and saturday, come hail, storm, f lood nothing could change her schedule for 15 years on the trot till Covid struck last year trains schedules got disrupted .

In these last 2 decades ,she never judged me, never ever pushed me, I was the laid back type, unaware of the worldly pressure of hospitals and being doctors, but I was eager to learn mom and my relationship turned from a son in law to a son in just a few years. She considered me as her elder son and I could genuinely feel the warmth and care from her, she was my mom’s best friend and understood her more than I could. She spent hours by her side when she was fighting her losing battle to cancer in 2013. Yes cancer took away both my moms.

One of the important lessons I tried to learn and imbibe from mom, was the art of forgiveness, she never had a klaish or malice for anyone, she was the great unifier , the one force that unites all and forgive those who wronged her. She never had the burden of expectation from others, she would forgive with an ease that is unbelievable. For all of us, family and hospital , mom was the pillar around which all of us thrived in our goals and missions. Mom was the fresh breeze which always calmed you down. They say nothing grows under a banyan tree, well mom was a tree that not only protected but assisted and made all of those who were under her flourish.

Mom always said that she was God’s favourite child, even when she was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer 1 year back, she was confident that God was on her side. She believed God only tests the strongest, and that is why she got the cancer, and she would fight it , after 26 cycles of chemo, her spirit was as strong as ever. She was the true ambassador of how to live and enjoy life with a positive attitude even in the most adverse circumstances . I strongly believe she is still remains among us, her soul has departed the mortal confines of the body, her impact on the lives of so many people around her will live on. but as Gita says

Weapons can not cleave the soul, fire cannot burn it, waters cannot wet it, and wind cannot dry it.

The body withers away into ashes, but memories and decades of good will, values stay with us. Instead of wishing I had more time with her, I am just grateful and thankful to God and fate for the time got to spend so closely with. In the end I would like to once again thank you all for coming to this praarthanaaon sabha , I hope we all remember her by following her values and let her memories not fade away with time.

Om Shanti !


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