Mental Health

What an Indian mother living in a Joint family really needs! | by Shivangi Maniar | Oct, 2021

Shivangi Maniar
Photo by Alessio Miraglia on Unsplash

100%- staggering statistics around Joint families !

Whenever a mother (living in a joint family set up) calls me for a conversation, I can be 100% sure that it’s more than that !

The conversation starts with parenting-hows.

However , within an hour or so , the real muck emerges.

-Unsorted Relationships
-Roles mapping with no correlation to individual tastes
-Lack of privacy
-Personal agendas

This is how real the conversation becomes.

The presentation varies , the pain is similiar.

Many of us birth children as it is the next milestone in life after marriage (mostly because we are numb)

BEFORE we clean out the invisible and murky interconnections.

And a child comes along , happily presses the trigger and BOOM, you feel it is your parenting that needs expert help.

A joint family set up is perfect to raise a child.
And yet , many of us cannot make optimum use of this framework.

For all mothers who are suffocating in a houseful of people , this is what you need to feel comfortable.

1. Veto power- Being heard
2. Financial independence

A joint family ( with all its aches and pains ) is a grounding base in itself. Your child benefits immensely from interaction and associations within the family.

But I would love for an Indian mom to be able to breathe too.

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